We know that everyone has been waiting to hear what has been happening and we've been reluctant to post . . . . the news is not what everyone, including us, was hoping and praying for.
After a sleepless night last night, a lot of prayers and a serious talk with Hailee this morning we have come to the conclusion that Kiera Saltanat does not want the things out of life that we had hoped and dreamed for her. Since this decision has been so difficult and it is very hard to talk about we cannot share our feelings right now. Perhaps in time.
What this decision means for us . . . . we basically have two options - come home now without a child or start the process over again. As you all know, we cannot leave Uralsk without a child -- it is what we have wanted. So, we have to start again. On Monday we will meet with the Minister of Education and see where we go from there.
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23 comments:
I'm sorry.
That's such a loss.
Gather strength from each other and have faith. YOUR child is still waiting for you. You'll find her and you'll know.
I'm so sorry that things did not work out as planned. I cannot imagine how devastated you all must be. Cheryl, you have such a big and loving heart that I imagine that when you're at the orphanage you just want to envelope all of the kids in a big group hug and that you'd like to take them all home or at least stay in Uralsk until you've found them all homes. So, with things not working out with Kiera Saltanat, I can't even fathom how sad you must be feeling. I know that at school, with the way I talk (the language I use), people don't think that I'm spiritual but I am . . . and I truly believe that God has a plan for us and His plan for us is perfect. We often don't understand why things like this happen but I do believe things happen for a reason, even if that reason doesn't become clear to us until many years later. Sometimes the reason things happen never becomes clear but everything that happens is part of God's plan. I truly believe that there is a perfect child waiting for you to find her. You are such a loving, caring, wonderful family and any child would be so very lucky to have you. I've gone through some difficult situations in my life and two of my favorite quotes that have helped through those times are: "Perhaps strength doesn't reside in having never been broken . . . but in the courage required to grow strong in the broken places." The other one is: "Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow." (Mary Anne Radmacher) I hope those quotes might help you too as you deal with your pain right now. Please know that I'll be praying for you to find the wonderful child who is just waiting for you to discover her and praying for you now as you deal with your feelings about things not working out with Kiera Saltanat.
I really miss you at school!
Take care,
Ann Duquaine
When I did not see your post yesterday, this news was what I felt deep down was coming. But as others have said, and you know deep in your soul, God did bring you there for a reason. Saltanat was what brought you there, but as you are finding out, she was not meant for you. God has a different plan and He does answer our prayers, sometimes it just isn't the answer we want to hear. You will find your child and she will love you and want you.
I wish I could be there with you and just sit down for one of our chats, but know that you are in my thoughts 24/7 and will be until all four of you are home safely!
Love you all...
Hi Guys,
I am so sorry! Although I have to admit that yesterday when I did not see a post, I knew in my heart what was coming..I just had an inkling, of course I was hoping that instinct was wrong for your sake, but unfortunately it wasn't. I LOVE YOU ALL, and know that I fully believe that God brought you there for a reason, and you will find the right child to join our family, she is just waiting out there for you to love her, and bring her home and into the family. I love you, and cant imagine what emotions and everything else you are going through, I wish I was there to hug you tight and let you know that as much as this hurts, there is the perfect member for our family there! Love You All, Lisa
I am at a loss for words. Sad for you guys. Know that you are in our prayers. It'll be a long weekend. Think positive. Monday will be bring better things for you. I read Ann's comment and wow. She has a way with words. It made me cry. Things happen for a reason. Hard to except right now. The right child will come along. Take care. We are all here for you. miss you and love you kim
Watch your post daily. Missed your posting yesterday. Deep down knew why.
One thing when God closes one door on you, he always opens another. May you all find thru him, strength to endure what lies ahead. Happy will be the day when you find that special family member waiting to love all of you as much as you look forward to loveing her.
Tho times are difficult now, look ahead to meeting that someone special waiting for your family to bring her home. Love and miss you all. (hope you know who this is from as I had to change name as the other one didn't work.)
I'm so sorry. I know it's difficult, but God works in ways that we sometimes don't understand. The answer will come. My prayers are with you.
First of all Hayden says hi and is missing you all. (He is right here with me) I read him your blog everyday so he knows what you all are up to. Maybe that is why he was feeling so yuckie yesterday, he was missing you and knew you needed some family at the time and was sad he couldn't be there for you. We miss you here but know God wants you to bring us back a new family member to love so hang in there. Hope it becomes easier and we all hope you find the right child that we can love too! We miss you and you are in our prayers.
I wish there were something I could say or do for you!
Please know that I have you in my thoughts and prayers. I am confident you will find a child who fits in well with your loving and very generous family.
Did you ever find the yarn?
Missing you at work!
Mary Sanchez
They say 'No news is good news". They are wrong. However, I would guess that God has someone who not only wants you, but needs you more than Saltanat thinks she does in mind for you.
She may miss out on a better life, but maybe not. She definitely will miss out on the best family she could ever have. I hope she doesn't have second thoughts once it's too late, and that she ends up with the life that she dreams of.
You have had enough emotional roller coaster riding. Time to let go and let God. I know. Easier said than done.
Prayers and love.
Lori
Hi Guys,
Not much left to say that others haven't already said. As you well know, ANY child you bring home will be loved and adored by all of us. Honestly, I'm glad you found out now, rather than later when it was too late. I'm sure the upcoming days and weeks will continue to be emotional, but I also know that you will find your child and she will be one lucky girl. As has been said many times before, God always has a plan for us and reasons for what he does. Continue to have faith and all will work out for the best. Know that as sad as we all are that Saltanat won't be joining our family, we're equally as excited about the new child that will be. We know you'll find that special child that's perfect for you. :)
Lots of hugs being sent your way. Brett and Bon are just walking in with Ben and Sadie, as I'm babysitting tonight, so I gotta go.
We miss you!!!!
We are so sorry.
You are and always have been in our thoughts and in our prayers.
There is a plan.....you may not see it now, but after everything is said and done.....
You will have a miracle.
Love you.
Maria, Brian, Owen, & Avery Sell
Dear Cheryl and family,
God has sent you to Uralsk for a child who truly needs you. Believe in both your mind and your heart that she will make herself known to you. It will happen.
Everyone at school misses you and sends their love.
~Rhonda:)
We are very sorry to hear that. Keep your heads high and keep looking, a loving family like you guys that have so much love to offer will find a child who wants all of your love. believe that God does have a speacial plan for you guys, don't beat urself up and remember you have alot of people that love you guys no matter what you decide to do.
Hi Guys,
I just wanted you to know that your house is fine. Tonight we had some bad thunderstorms, and after 1 hour and a half without power and darkness all around (candles only light so much of a house) We went to the house and watched a movie. The lightening took down a pole in our neighborhood because as we were driving, the Walgreens on the corner had light, and every where else did, just not our street, odd..but anyways the house was great..still no tulips...Love You Guys, Lisa
We are thinking of you guys and praying for you. I can not imagine what you are feeling.
My heart is with you guys, Rudy even knows something is not right.
Enjoy your weekend the best you can and lots of luck on Monday.
Sending prayers and lots of love.
Just a note to say WE LOVE YOU GUYS!! Wish I could come and give you all hugs, it would make me feel better. Sorry things aren't going as you thought. Club was here and they are all praying for you, it was a nice evening. Not much to tell you today. I will write tomorrow, I am going to see mom and Gordie today. Know that all things are possible, He will help you through this. Love and Hugs, missing you all..
I set up the account for you this morning; let me know if you are still having problems.
3ollmannsinrussia@comcast.net
haileeisadork
I'm so sorry to hear how things have ended up. What a difficult decision to make. (I can't even imagine.) But know you all tried really hard to bond with Kiera and that you gave it your all. I pray that Monday goes better. Know this: you will return home with "your" daughter. And I know Yulia will see to it that that happens.
Hugs,
Karen
Hi Uncle Jack, Aunt Cheryl, and Hailee,
Ever since returning from Florida, I have been reading the blogs you've posted each day. I cannot imagine the roller coaster you are riding on right now, but know that so many people back home are supporting you and here for you while you find your newest member of the family.
I am so sorry to hear that things didn't work out with Saltanat. Although this is a very tough time for you all, please remember that everything happens for a reason and, although that reason may not be clear right now, it will be in the end.
I hope that Monday's meeting goes well for you. Your new daughter is waiting for you to find her!
We love you all very much!
Nicole
Just a short note about the parental units. I went on Sat. and visited with mom, Bonnie brought Sadie and Ben also. A nice visit. Mom was telling Bon about the 5 yr old girl who is always in her room. She takes things you know. And so it goes now. I took her to lunch and stopped over by Gordie. We chatted for awhile and I told him what is happening there. He was sad and cried a little, he can't understand who wouldn't want to come to the USA. I said it was a little more than that. He was enjoying his lunch, one of his favorites, stuffed peppers. When I was leaving I asked him it he had anything I should tell you, He immediately said, Tell her I Love Her. So that is from your dad. I am going to see him on Tues or Wed. He needs his nails cut, they are quite long. I will take him a small treat also. He is doing well. I am missing your daily update, hope all is well with you all. Pastor said a prayer for you in church this morning, and you will be added to the prayer page. I need to get in the basement now, we are unpacking more stuff, and getting ready for our rummage sale. Love and hugs to you all, missing you ...
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